You have a plot and direction for your story, author. I salute you for that. You also have a good grasp of how to play with your MC's emotions and ideas. The story is engaging. Your grammar still has room for improvement but you don't have to worry much about it because your sentences flow naturally and it's still easy to follow. I think what you should prioritize for now is the stability of updates and more on world background. Also, work on the punctuations and capitalization. Also break down your paragraphs into more paragraphs. I suggest you always leave the quoted conversations as a line/paragraph of itself. In other words, work on making your paragraphs easier on the eyes. Honestly, some chapters look more like a wall of text to me. And I hate to say this, but many readers dislike wall of texts. XDUhh, no worries. This is all just the technical side. When it comes to content, you're already on the right direction. :-)
